Once you
have established a focused introduction with a three point
thesis, it is time for you to write the developmental paragraphs
of your essay. This is where you should spend the most time for
your writing. In order to write strong, connected developmental
paragraphs, you must be able to understand three things:
qualities of a good paragraph and a good topic sentence.
Qualities of a good paragraph
A paragraph should be unified around a main point. The main
point should be clear to the reader.
Generally, state the main point of a paragraph in the topic
sentence. The topic is usually found in the first line of the
paragraph.
The remaining sentences in the paragraph must relate to the
topic sentence.
Qualities of a good topic sentence
Just as sentences in the paragraph relate to the topic
sentence, the topic sentence should relate back to a key point
in the thesis. This makes your essay have an overall
connectedness, which is exactly what a reader wants to see.
Consider the following sample essay written by an student who
took a practice thirty minute exam:
Essay prompt
Many students have to live with roommates while going to
school or university. What are some of the important
qualities of a good roommate? Use specific reasons and
examples to explain why these qualities are important.
Choosing a roommate to live with is a much more important
decision then most students think it is. To me, it is like
giving your house key to someone you may not know too well. I
need to be able to trust this person fully without a doubt in my
mind that they will respect my privacy and personal belongings.
Hanging out with someone and living with somebody are two very
different activities. In order for me to choose a person worthy
enough to be my roommate, that person must have specific
qualities I am looking for. The most important characteristic
should be honesty. Other traits I would look for is cleanliness
and a clean slate.
If I am going to live with someone, it is imperative that
they understand and practice honesty. My possessions are of high
value to me and I want to be able to leave the room worry free;
that is, even my smallest insignificant piece of property goes
untouched unless permission is granted. I would treat the other
person’s property in the same fashion, so I expect it in
return.
I cannot stand to live in a disorganized place where
everything is cluttered around. I am a neat person and to me,
everything has it own place. I like things to be organized so I
know exactly where it is when I need it. I found that I do not
get along well with messy people. This is not to say that I
don’t have messy friends, but living with messy people is a
different ball game.
Having a clean slate is an important characteristic to me
because I don’t want to get caught up in problems resulting
from the illegal activities of someone else. Even though I may
not have committed any crimes, I could still be involved because
I live with that person. Those are extra problems I could do
without. Some of those activities can also be contagious, where
I might start participating in it merely because I am around it.
Living with the person forces me to be around it, whereas if I
was just hanging around, I can just leave and go elsewhere.
There are many people I hang out with but I would not choose
to live with them. In order for me to even consider living with
them, they would have to be honest, tidy, and clean, at the very
least.
Now read the essay after I have removed everything but the
thesis and the topic sentences:
The most important characteristic should be honesty.
Other traits I would look for is cleanliness and a clean
slate.
If I am going to live with someone, it is imperative that
they understand and practice honesty.
I cannot stand to live in a disorganized place where
everything is cluttered around.
Having a clean slate is an important characteristic to
me because I don’t want to get caught up in problems resulting
from the illegal activities of someone else.
There are many people I hang out with but I would not choose
to live with them. In order for me to even consider living with
them, they would have to be honest, tidy, and clean, at
the very least.
This essay is effective because
By introducing the qualities of honesty, cleanliness and a
clean slate and by developing them in subsequent paragraphs
with specific reasons and examples, the essay has effectively
addressed the writing task.
The essay has a strong thesis statement in the first
paragraph, and the essay restates those key points as topic
sentences in the remaining paragraphs to give the essay a
tight organization. Though the conclusion is a bit short, the
writer brings the main points of the essay to a closure by
saying that a person has to be honest, tidy, and clean, at the
very least.
