Revising Sentences with Comma Splices, Run-ons , and
Fragments
In each exercise, you will see a paragraph
with a specified number of errors in comma splices, run-on sentences, and
fragments. Using a sheet of paper, write down a revised version of the
paragraph. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Your goal is to complete at least ten exercises in a row or until you have
mastered the lesson.
Exercise 1
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, and two
errors with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Recognizing the need to earn money, many students attend
school. So they can learn small business administration. One of my friends
from Taiwan is studying in an MBA program right now, so he can return to
work in his father’s company, this student wants to attend school now so
that he can develop the entrepreneurial skills. Which will help him grow
his father’s business.
Revised paragraph: Recognizing the need to earn money,
many students attend school, so they can learn small business
administration. One of my friends from Taiwan is studying in an MBA
program right now, so he can return to work in his father’s company.
This student wants to attend school now so that he can develop the
entrepreneurial skills which will help him grow his father’s business.
Exercise 2
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Secondly, students do not have to concern about their time
and place they who are students and coaches can study together whenever
they want, wherever they want. To illustrate, if you do not want to study
in your room or study room. You can study at café or restaurant with your
coach, moreover, if you are morning person, you can study in the morning
with your coach.
Revised paragraph:
Secondly, students do not have to concern about their time
and place. They who are student and coach can study together whenever they
want, wherever they want. To illustrate, if you do not want to study in
your room or study room, you can study at café or restaurant with your
coach. Moreover, if you are morning person, you can study in the morning
with your coach.
Exercise 3
This paragraph has two errors with sentence fragments.
Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
A coach also instills sportsman’s spirit in his
students. If all the world were to remember the advice given to them by
their coaches. Half of the vices in our societies in general would be
weeded out. The terms 'Fair Play' and 'Its not cricket' depict the fact
that the sportsman's spirit inculcated in the student’s mind by the
coaches is a great virtue indeed. As good sportsman's spirit is rightly
considered synonyms with fair play and uprightness.
Revised paragraph:
A coach also instills sportsman’s spirit in his
students. If all the world were to remember the advice given to them by
their coaches, half of the vices in our societies in general would be
weeded out. The terms 'Fair Play' and 'Its not cricket' depict the fact
that the sportsman's spirit inculcated in the student’s mind by the
coaches is a great virtue indeed as good sportsman's spirit is rightly
considered synonyms with fair play and uprightness.
Exercise 4
This paragraph has three errors with sentence fragments.
Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Revised paragraph:
First, microwaves and fast food restaurants can contribute
to obesity. In that people who use them also tend to buy microwave
dinners/meals which are often high in fats and sugars. And if a person
eats a lot of high fat and sugary foods; he will become fat. It seems that
recently in my country. More and more people are becoming overweight.
Revised paragraph:
First, microwaves and fast food restaurants can contribute
to obesity in that people who use them also tend to buy microwave
dinners/meals which are often high in fats and sugars. And if a person
eats a lot of high fat and sugary foods, he will become fat. It seems that
recently in my country, more and more people are becoming overweight.
Exercise 5
This paragraph has two errors with comma splices, and one
error with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
First, fast foods and other kind of foods that can be
quickly cooked in the microwave contain a lot of dietary sugar and fat,
these are very difficult to digest. This can lead to the deposition of
unwanted fat and clogging of arteries, thus giving a chance to a high risk
of diseases and obesity. For example, consider frozen vegetables that can
be cooked easily, they have many preservatives mixed in. Which in the long
run is not good for health.
Revised paragraph:
First, fast foods and other kind of foods that can be
quickly cooked in the microwave contain a lot of dietary sugar and fat.
These are very difficult to digest. This can lead to the deposition of
unwanted fat and clogging of arteries, thus giving a chance to a high risk
of diseases and obesity. For example, consider frozen vegetables that can
be cooked easily. They have many preservatives mixed in which in a long
run is not good for health.
Exercise 6
This paragraph has two errors with comma splices, and one
error with run-on sentences. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Both classroom instruction and personal experience are
similar in that they are necessary for one to survive in the workplace,
for example, a computer programmer is trained in writing software programs
and in understanding the hardware components of a personal computer. The
classroom instruction will give the programmer the basic skills by which
to work, however, every programmer will encounter problems for which no
solution was taught in the classroom, and he will have to use trial and
error in order to solve the problem. And through personal experience, the
programmer will learn to solve more and more complex problems two very
important forms of knowledge, the classroom instruction and personal
experience serve to help the programmer to become more and more advanced.
Revised paragraph:
Both classroom instruction and personal experience are
similar in that they are necessary for one to survive in the workplace.
For example, a computer programmer is trained in writing software programs
and in understanding the hardware components of a personal computer. The
classroom instruction will give the programmer the basic skills by which
to work. However, every programmer will encounter problems for which no
solution was taught in the classroom, and he will have to use trial and
error in order to solve the problem. And through personal experience, the
programmer will learn to solve more and more complex problems. Two very
important forms of knowledge, the classroom instruction and personal
experience serve to help the programmer to become more and more advanced.
Exercise 7
This paragraph has two errors with sentence fragments.
Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
However, the two modes of instruction are very different
in that classroom instruction is explicitly taught. While personal
experience knowledge is acquired naturally. A student must go to school
for many years in order to learn. What is taught in the classroom. But he
will not need any formal education at all to learn personal experience
knowledge.
However, the two modes of instruction are very different
in that classroom instruction is explicitly taught, while personal
experience knowledge is acquired naturally. A student must go to school
for many years in order to learn what is taught in the classroom, but he
will not need any formal education at all to learn personal experience
knowledge.
Exercise 8
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
The advantages to building a military base near my
community might be an increase in jobs and security many soldiers will
live at the base, and they will go to the city to buy clothes, food, and
entertainment, all of them will generate more revenue for the city.
Moreover, the military base will provide a sense of security to the
community and the nation. Since the soldiers who live there have taken an
oath to protect my country and constitution at any cost.
Revised paragraph:
The advantages to building a military base near my
community might be an increase in jobs and security. Many soldiers will
live at the base, and they will go to the city to buy clothes, food, and
entertainment, all of which will generate more revenue for the city.
Moreover, the military base will provide a sense of security to the
community and the nation since the soldiers who live there have taken an
oath to protect my country and constitution at any cost.
Exercise 9
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
The disadvantages to constructing a military base could be
an increase in crime and pollution. First, look at Okinawa as an example
sometimes some of the soldiers go into the city to drink and party, and
then a young girl gets raped, and some fights happen. Many are hurt and
lives are shattered. Because of crime caused by the soldiers from the
military base. Second, there could also be an increase in pollution since
many military vehicles emit harmful fumes to the environment, noise
pollution could also be a problem since military bases often engage in
"war games" by setting off explosions and shooting machine guns.
Revised paragraph:
The disadvantages to constructing a military base could be
an increase in crime and pollution. First, look at Okinawa as an example.
Sometimes, some of the soldiers go into the city to drink and party, and
then a young girl gets raped, and some fights happen. Many are hurt and
lives are shattered because of crime caused by the soldiers from the
military base. Second, there could also be an increase in pollution since
many military vehicles emit harmful fumes to the environment. Noise
pollution could also be a problem since military bases often engage in
"war games" by setting off explosions and shooting machine guns.
Exercise 10
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
First, the people in my country have been paying higher
and higher taxes in recent years despite the fact that we are in a
recession. Lowering the taxes would offer relief to these people who could give money back to the economy by buying more consumer products. The
increase in the purchasing of products such as furniture, automobiles,
appliances, and so on could give my country more economic strength, which could help my country get out of its long
ten-year recession.
Revised paragraph:
First, the people in my country have been paying higher
and higher taxes in recent years despite the fact that we are in a
recession. Lowering the taxes would offer relief to these people, and they
could give money back to the economy by buying more consumer products. The
increase in the purchasing of products such as furniture, automobiles,
appliances, and so on could give my country more economic strength. This
in turn could help my country get out of its long ten_year recession.
Exercise 11
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Unemployment is responsible for the high crime rate in the
metro cities of my country as someone has said, an empty mind is a devil's
workshop. Young men and women come from small towns to bigger cities to
find work, when they don't, they find alternate ways to 'earn' their daily
bread. These alternate ways can range from stealing, begging, looting, and
more. Giving them employment would divert their mind. To useful work that
would be directly beneficial to the society.
Revised paragraph:
Unemployment is responsible for the high crime rate in the
metro cities of my country. As someone has said, an empty mind is a
devil's workshop. Young men and women come from small towns to bigger
cities to find work. When they don't, they find alternate ways to 'earn'
their daily bread. These alternate ways can range from stealing, begging,
looting, and more. Giving them employment would divert their mind to
useful work that would be directly beneficial to the society.
Exercise 12
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, and one
error with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Politically speaking, a politician must have name
recognition in order to be elected; that is, the people in my country must
know who he is and have heard about him. Before they will have confidence
to cast a vote in his direction. Short thirty_second TV commercials are a
very effective way for people in a country to become acquainted with a
politician, similarly, billboards and radio ads can influence people to
vote for or against a particular political candidate.
Revised paragraph:
Politically speaking, a politician must have name
recognition in order to be elected; that is, the people in my country must
know who he is and have heard about him before they will have confidence
to cast a vote in his direction. Short thirty_second TV commercials are a
very effective way for people in a country to become acquainted with a
politician. Similarly, billboards and radio ads can influence people to
vote for or against a particular political candidate.
Exercise 13
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, and one
error with run-on sentences. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Economically speaking, a consumer will not buy a product
that he is unfamiliar with, in fact, many times a consumer will make an
unconscious decision to buy a particular brand of toothpaste solely based
on the fact that he has seen that product advertised in a way the consumer
has been conditioned by the advertiser to buy that particular brand of
toothpaste.
Revised paragraph:
Economically speaking, a consumer will not buy a product
that he is unfamiliar with. In fact, many times a consumer will make an
unconscious decision to buy a particular brand of toothpaste solely based
on the fact that he has seen that product advertised. In a way, the
consumer has been conditioned by the advertiser to buy that particular
brand of toothpaste.
Exercise 14
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Aside from economic benefits, the Internet is a very
powerful educational tool for example, an elementary school class who
might be studying about different types of music could go to the Internet
to listen to actual recordings of the artist, the students could get
reinforced instruction from the Internet to help them remember the ideas
being taught in the classroom. It has been said that hearing is good,
seeing is better, but doing is best. The Internet provides many
educational opportunities where children "see" and
"do" things. Which will help increase their knowledge.
Revised paragraph:
Aside from economic benefits, the Internet is a very
powerful educational tool. For example, an elementary school class who
might be studying about different types of music could go to the Internet
to listen to actual recordings of the artist. The students could get
reinforced instruction from the Internet to help them remember the ideas
being taught in the classroom. It has been said that hearing is good,
seeing is better, but doing is best. The Internet provides many
educational opportunities where children "see" and
"do" things which will help increase their knowledge.
Exercise 15
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Internet is also a very good form of entertainment it is
slowly taking over the print media, the television, and the radio. The web
has something or the other for men and women of all ages, take for
instance, my grand father. He surfs the Net for a couple of hours
everyday. This way, he not only keeps himself busy but also spreads his
knowledge around. By teaching us many good things.
Revised paragraph:
Internet is also a very good form of entertainment. It is
slowly taking over the print media, the television, and the radio. The web
has something or the other for men and women of all ages. Take for
instance, my grand father. He surfs the Net for a couple of hours
everyday. This way, he not only keeps himself busy but also spreads his
knowledge around by teaching us many good things.
Exercise 16
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, and one
error with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
School can offer a person knowledge about academic
subjects. Such as Geography. Case in point, a student studying Physical
Geography can learn about how mountains are formed, thus developing in him
a deeper respect for the environment, consequently, the student may decide
to take such a class in order to make sure that our earth is protected
from neglect in future generations.
Revised paragraph:
School can offer a person knowledge about academic
subjects such as Geography. Case in point, a student studying Physical
Geography can learn about how mountains are formed, thus developing in him
a deeper respect for the environment. Consequently, the student may decide
to take such a class in order to make sure that our earth is protected
from neglect in future generations.
Exercise 17
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, and one
error with run-on sentences. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Attending a small university has its advantages for the
student who likes to be a big fish in a small pond this type of student
likes the small sized classes with the more personal teaching style of the
professors. At this university, the student sees many opportunities to
serve in clubs and leadership positions, perhaps, in this type of
university, the student has a real sense of belonging and camaraderie with
others.
Revised paragraph: Attending a small university has its
advantages for the student who likes to be a big fish in a small pond.
This type of student likes the small sized classes with the more personal
teaching style of the professors. At this university, the student sees
many opportunities to serve in clubs and leadership positions. Perhaps, in
this type of university, the student has a real sense of belonging and
camaraderie with others.
Exercise 18
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, and one
error with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
The large university has its advantages for the student
who likes to be a small fish in a big pond, this student doesn't want to
stand out, doesn't mind the less intimate atmosphere, and prefers to not
be involved in clubs and leadership positions. This student, however, does
like the many parties and activities which may happen on a daily basis and
may thrive on many types of campus facilities. Which may not be offered at
a smaller university.
Revised paragraph:
The large university has its advantages for the student
who likes to be a small fish in a big pond. This student doesn't want to
stand out, doesn't mind the less intimate atmosphere, and prefers to not
be involved in clubs and leadership positions. This student, however, does
like the many parties and activities which may happen on a daily basis and
may thrive on many types of campus facilities which may not be offered at
a smaller university.
Exercise 19
This paragraph has one error with run-on sentences, and
one error with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Most people say hard work is the only reason for success
the discoveries of scientists, Leonardo da Vinci's beautiful paintings,
and Shakespeare's wonderful plays were all because of their hard work
and luck had nothing to do with it. If they had not worked hard.
Edison said: "Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety_nine
percent perspiration."
Revised paragraph:
Most people say hard work is the only reason for success.
The discoveries of scientists, Leonardo da Vinci's beautiful paintings,
and Shakespeare's wonderful plays were all because of their hard work
and luck had nothing to do with it if they had not worked hard.
Edison said: "Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety_nine
percent perspiration."
Exercise 20
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
To the average worker, the key to success is by working
harder: putting in more overtime and doing the job faster, for example, an
employee for an Accounting firm may choose to work 50-70 hours each week
to show his commitment to the company in addition, a worker on a furniture
assembly line might strive to make sofas faster than the rest of the
employees in the company. These employees’ efforts are creating more
money for the owner of the company. Although perhaps sometime down the
line. They may be rewarded for their efforts by a small raise.
Revised paragraph:
To the average worker, the key to success is by working
harder: putting in more overtime and doing the job faster. For example, an
employee for an Accounting firm may choose to work 50-70 hours each week
to show his commitment to the company. In addition, a worker on a
furniture assembly line might strive to make sofas faster than the rest of
the employees in the company. These employees’ efforts are creating more
money for the owner of the company, although perhaps sometime down the
line, they may be rewarded for their efforts by a small raise.
Exercise 21
This paragraph has one error with comma splices and two
errors with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Sports bring out the competitive spirit in a person. Thus
building confidence in the individual. Whether it is a team game or an
individual sport, the chance to compete with others in the same group, and
the urge to perform well on a sports ground builds confidence in a
student. Participating in a team sport enhances a student's ability to
interact with people around and to coordinate with others, this confidence
and ability to share holds a student in good stead. When he interacts with
others in the society.
Revised paragraph:
Sports bring out the competitive spirit in a person, thus
building confidence in the individual. Whether it is a team game or an
individual sport, the chance to compete with others in the same group, and
the urge to perform well on a sports ground builds confidence in a
student. Participating in a team sport enhances a student's ability to
interact with people around and to coordinate with others. This confidence
and ability to share holds a student in good stead when he interacts with
others in the society.
Exercise 22
This paragraph has one error with comma splices and one
error with run-on sentences. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
A student's capability should not be judged alone on his
or her academic results it may happen that a student not doing well in his
studies might turn out to be a very able sports person. Teachers
interacting with such students should be sensitive enough to identify such
potential in the students and help them develop their talent in sports.
The sports facilities available in the universities go a long way in
creating interest among students towards sports, it would be rather sad if
a talented student is not able to pursue his or her field of sport due to
lack of facilities. Universities should make sure that proper
infrastructure is provided to the students and students with potential are
awarded for their achievements.
Revised paragraph:
A student's capability should not be judged alone on his
or her academic results. It may happen that a student not doing well in
his studies might turn out to be a very able sports person. Teachers
interacting with such students should be sensitive enough to identify such
potential in the students and help them develop their talent in sports.
The sports facilities available in the universities go a long way in
creating interest among students towards sports. It would be rather sad if
a talented student is not able to pursue his or her field of sport due to
lack of facilities. Universities should make sure that proper
infrastructure is provided to the students and students with potential are
awarded for their achievements.
Exercise 23
This paragraph has one error with comma splices and one
error with run-on sentences. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
The most compelling reason people visit museums is the
marketing strategy adopted by local tourism bodies in pulling tourists
about the different tourist attractions, including museums. Many countries
and cities all over the world have built museums with the only aim of
attracting tourists these museums and their USPs are boldly advertised in
the backdrop of national monuments, heritage and culture, this fosters a
need for a potential tourist to visit these museums on their forthcoming
trip.
Revised paragraph:
The most compelling reason people visit museums is the
marketing strategy adopted by local tourism bodies in pulling tourists
about the different tourist attractions, including museums. Many countries
and cities all over the world have built museums with the only aim of
attracting tourists. These museums and their USPs are boldly advertised in
the backdrop of national monuments, heritage and culture. This fosters a
need for a potential tourist to visit these museums on their forthcoming
trip.
Exercise 24
This paragraph has two errors with comma splices, one
error with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise
these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
In my opinion, people visit museums. Because they give
cumulative information about culture, history, and features on that area.
Assume that you went to Korea even though you look into Korea personally
before visiting there, it is hard for you to fully understand Korea. It is
because you did not experience it directly. In a museum, you can see and
feel from old things to new ones, for example, in the other places, you
can experience it partly, but not get total image about Korea; in the
restaurant, you can just eat Korean foods, in the library, you can find
some history and culture about Korea by books, but you can find it in your
country and not see original antiques, and pictures.
Revised paragraph:
In my opinion, people visit museums because they give
cumulative information about culture, history, and features on that area.
Assume that you went to Korea. Even though you look into Korea personally
before visiting there, it is hard for you to fully understand Korea. It is
because you did not experience it directly. In a museum, you can see and
feel from old things to new ones. For example, in the other places, you
can experience it partly, but not get total image about Korea; in the
restaurant, you can just eat Korean foods. In the library, you can find
some history and culture about Korea by books, but you can find it in your
country and not see original antiques, and pictures.
Exercise 25
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and one error with sentence fragments. Revise these
mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Eating out can be very expensive a few months ago, I ate
out twice a week for a while. Due to my busy schedule of going to school
and holding down a full_time job. When I ate at Denny's, the cost for my
meal was $8.50, including the tip. On other occasions, I ate at the
Yamazato and the Mikado restaurants, both of them cost me more than $25
for each meal. That month my food bill was over three hundred dollars.
Revised paragraph:
Eating out can be very expensive. A few months ago, I ate
out twice a week for a while due to my busy schedule of going to school
and holding down a full_time job. When I ate at Denny's, the cost for my
meal was $8.50, including the tip. On other occasions, I ate at the
Yamazato and the Mikado restaurants, both of which cost me more than $25
for each meal. That month my food bill was over three hundred dollars.
Exercise 26
This paragraph has one error with comma splices, one error
with run-on sentences, and two errors with sentence fragments. Revise
these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Perhaps the best reason for eating at home is health
reasons. When I was a teenager, I used to eat out a lot with my friends
(i.e., McDonald’s, the Sushi Lounge, Burger King, Yoshinoya). Naturally
since I got into the habit of doing this. I continued to eat out when I
got into my twenties. But now I seem to gain weight easily. When I eat out
since many of these restaurant foods taste very delicious but contain high
amounts of fat, consequently, I gained a total of 25 lbs between the ages
of 20 and 25 years of age, at which point I made a decision to stop eating
out except on very special occasions I am happy to say that I have now
lost 15 lbs, and I am feeling a lot healthier as a result.
Revised paragraph:
Perhaps the best reason for eating at home is health
reasons. When I was a teenager, I used to eat out a lot with my friends
(i.e., McDonald’s, the Sushi Lounge, Burger King, Yoshinoya). Naturally
since I got into the habit of doing this, I continued to eat out when I
got into my twenties. But now I seem to gain weight easily when I eat out
since many of these restaurant foods taste very delicious but contain high
amounts of fat. Consequently, I gained a total of 25 lbs between the ages
of 20 and 25 years of age, at which point I made a decision to stop eating
out except on very special occasions. I am happy to say that I have now
lost 15 lbs, and I am feeling a lot healthier as a result.
Exercise 27
This paragraph has one error with comma splices and one
error with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
First, the option of not attending classes and learning
through correspondence makes it possible and easier for people who have
other responsibilities, other than just studying, to study. For example,
distance learning courses offered by universities make it possible for
mothers who have small children and cannot leave the house to get a
university degree, similarly, the option of learning through
correspondence makes it possible for people. Who have multiple jobs or a
very busy daily routine to study when they find free time.
Revised paragraph:
First, the option of not attending classes and learning
through correspondence makes it possible and easier for people who have
other responsibilities, other than just studying, to study. For example,
distance learning courses offered by universities make it possible for
mothers who have small children and cannot leave the house to get a
university degree. Similarly, the option of learning through
correspondence makes it possible for people who have multiple jobs or a
very busy daily routine to study when they find free time.
Exercise 28
This paragraph has one error with run-on sentences and two
errors with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Second, studying by not attending classes makes it
possible for handicapped people who find it difficult to travel from one
place to another to get an education for example, a correspondence course
makes it simpler for a person who has only one leg to get an education. As
it saves that person the trouble of traveling from home to the university
and from one class to another. Instead of having to worry about how to get
to the university or from one class to another. Such a person can
concentrate and put in all his efforts into studying.
Revised paragraph:
Second, studying by not attending classes makes it
possible for handicapped people who find it difficult to travel from one
place to another to get an education. For example, a correspondence course
makes it simpler for a person who has only one leg to get an education as
it saves that person the trouble of traveling from home to the university
and from one class to another. Instead of having to worry about how to get
to the university or from one class to another, such a person can
concentrate and put in all his efforts into studying.
Exercise 29
This paragraph has one error with comma splices and two
errors with run-on sentences. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Most modern countries are changing from an
industrial_based to an information_based economy the Internet is the
vehicle that people can use to conduct business in areas that they would
have not had access if not for the Internet, for example, a bicycle
company in Japan can start an E_commerce store on the Internet. Consumers
from Thailand, Germany, and Russia can go the Web Site and place orders
for bicycles the Japanese bicycle company is able to expand its market
internationally and significantly increase profits.
Revised paragraph: Most modern countries are changing from
an industrial_based to an information_based economy. The Internet is the
vehicle that people can use to conduct business in areas that they would
have not had access if not for the Internet. For example, a bicycle
company in Japan can start an E_commerce store on the Internet. Consumers
from Thailand, Germany, and Russia can go the Web Site and place orders
for bicycles. The Japanese bicycle company is able to expand its market
internationally and significantly increase profits.
Exercise 30
This paragraph has two errors with comma splices and one
error with sentence fragments. Revise these mistakes. Then scroll down your screen to see a possible revision of the paragraph.
Additionally, good neighbors provide security and think of
their neighbors as a cohesive family, for example, Steve saw a strange man
standing in front of his neighbor's house yesterday night. He immediately
called both the police and his other two neighbors immediately, the entire
neighborhood was awake and the suspect fled. This example was aired all
over the state and country. As a model for the neighborhood watch program.
Revised paragraph:
Additionally, good neighbors provide security and think of
their neighbors as a cohesive family. For example, Steve saw a strange man
standing in front of his neighbor's house yesterday night. He immediately
called both the police and his other two neighbors. Immediately, the
entire neighborhood was awake and the suspect fled. This example was aired
all over the state and country as a model for the neighborhood watch
program.